It's very late but I can't sleep... I'm wide awake in that really tired sort of way. So I thought I would give my neglected blog a bit of attention and maybe declutter my mind a little... please forgive me for returning back to my favourite theme of the last few months: HOPE... This is how I'm feeling right now:

I am balancing on a tightrope of hope. The height is giddying. I can't even think about the fall, let alone look down. It's exhilariting but equally terrifying. The definition of instability. I want to get off; I want to stay on. I am on, whether I like it or not. It feels that this tightrope is part of my destiny. If I fall, and there always looms that possibility, I know there is a safety mat underneath. I know because it's saved me many times before. I might get bruised, even broken, but I'll mend. I'll heal. 
So I can't look down but I also can't think too much about getting to the other side, as that also would send me tumbling. All I can do is hold my breath, try to remain steady, slowly put one foot after the other, looking ahead, keeping my gaze steadfast, my head up. Daring to believe I might make it this time. Daring to believe there might be someone waiting at the other end.