I dont mean to sound pessimistic, but it keeps occurring to me that the only person/thing/being/presence we can trust in this world is...well, God. and Jesus, as He is God.

I just wanted to share this, as personally, it's something I keep having to 'get'. I'm 22 (which is a baby i know), and sometimes i still dont get why people let you down. I dont get disappointment. I dont get pain, and i just want to stamp my little foot in a fit of fury and exclaim "IT'S NOT FAIR!"

Well, of course it's not fair! Where would be the challenge in that? And what good would our lives be if we depended solely on one another and NOT on our Creator?

I wish i had a bible in front of me right now...but i dont...so i'll have to blag it! But the Good Book says;

"trust in the Lord your God; never rely on what you THINK you know. Commit your life to him, and he will show you the RIGHT way!"

"dont place your trust in mere men, for their ways are slippery and their minds foolish" (talk about paraphrasing!)

ahhh, somethin like that!

Does anyone ever get that slightly vulnerable feeling, where you're no longer sure of yourself? You open your mouth, and a pile of sillyness comes out? Where you cant really look people in the eye because there is an underlying fear of what they think of you? Ok; I reckon that's the Father's way of saying to us, "Hello! What you looking at that/them/this for? Dont you know already that it wont fill the gap? I KNOW WHO YOU ARE, i know what you are about. So why dont you ask me?"

To be completely honest, i still dont really know how to rebuild trust. As even in the knowledge that man(kind) will let us down, we were built to love each other, therefore commit to one another, therefore trust one another. But when that trust has been broken, our hearts broken and our hopes disappointed, how do we muster up the strength to get up from the dust and start heaving the bricks back into place to rebuild those foundations? I guess FORGIVENESS is the first step. and then perhaps LOVE is the second (or perhaps the other way around?). Though i have to say, they're two pretty hard steps to make. And you could well make them, then run the risk of them getting intervened by the other person messing it up again or not reciprocating! (anyone ever had that? it's like, "I'm flippin trying to love you, but you're making it reeeeeeally hard!")

But then look at ourselves...and how God sees us...and try and grasp the number of times we've really ballsed it up! and He's looked at us...and then said, "Well Jennifer, that's one time to many mrs!!!! I GIVE UP!"

... well, that doesn't happen...ever...EVER EVER EVER...

...what a perfect model of EVERYTHING we have is Jesus.