Amazing Grace

Been a while(!) since I posted something to this blog.. God has been dealing with different issues in my life lately. I feel as if my relationship with Jesus has been re-established all over again - based on His love for me and my love for Him. A "lovewalk" with Jesus, going deeper. I've been thinking a lot about calling and Gods plans for the future, why I do what I do and why I have chosen to live the life I now live. In Estonia. Things are so different now from how they were when I 1st came here in 2004. I have different tasks and been taking part of things I never thought I would do. I also sometimes question Gods ways. But I have found that serving the Lord and obeying His word & will can not be based upon a calling alone. Or a prophesy alone. It must 1st of all be based on Jesus. Loving Jesus. Being so lost in Him that when he asks me something, then I do that because I love Him. The word is response! I like that word. God will ask us to do things, both small & some bigger, but the thing is that He will ask. Not force. He will challenge and test us, that is for sure. What He asks for is a response to his question. Are we willing to go? Are we willing to forsake some things in life to follow Him? Oh, sometimes we are so scared to lose something we have... Then the question is, where is our heart? Is it in love with Jesus? Because that is where the difference lies... Then our response to Him is not based on our pastor or leaders opinion, a prophesy or fear of what will happen if we say no or a fear of loosing something good if we say yes. No, the response is based on love for our Saviour! My love for Him makes me wanna go where He sends me and do what He asks me!

I have always had dreams for my life & future - things I have been longing to see & happen. A lot of wishes. Thoughts coming and going. But it was when those dreams started to develope in to more clear visions that things got into motion.. A vision is different than a dream, because a vision is a clear picture of what will come, how it will develope & at what time & speed. God plant seeds in us, which is His thoughts & dreams, but in a vision, He has spoken!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU ALL!

We leave an amazing year behind, but what is ahead is even better, bigger & more amazing! We never stay at one place or in what is old, but we seek new ways to obtain new things. The pages for 2007 are unwritten, so it's time to get started :)

I didn't plan on writing anything more here for this year, since I'll be without a computer the next 2 and half weeks.. Anyhow, I was just so blessed & encouraged by the todays word by Joyce Meyer (as many now understand..;I read a lot of short sermons online:) It was a good "meal" for today & a great "pointer" to some areas in my life. I just felt like posting it here as well, let it bless you & also use this chance to say Merry Christmas to you all! I don't know you all by name & nationality, but I just bless you and wish you a fantastic time with family & friends! Now....let Joyce bless you as well:

This specific frase came to my attention as I read the todays word from the Osteens, and I started to think... A "God-sized" view. Gods view upon life, the future, money, healing, worship, love, worries...all! Sometimes I am very aware of my own limitations, and I somehow stay that way as long as I don't start viewing things in another way - in Gods way!

How strange it is to say goodbye without really saying it.. Understand what I mean..?
 
Today I said goodbye to a wonderful person who left this world much too early, but it was all such a beautyful day. Just amazing... So many people fear death even just by talking about it. The peace is gone. It is hard to say goodbye. All feels hopeless & dark. The grief is so huge..

The Lord is my sheperd,
I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
He leads me beside quiet waters,
where He restores my soul...
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for His names's sake...

Today I have been thinking a lot about life....and death... Life is just so precious. Family is so important. Each day is a true gift from God. Each new year contains new experiences to embrace and bring further into life. Life is amazing when u live it to the max for God, giving your all, using your full potential & being right where He wants you to be.. But what if life suddenly ends without any warning? No preparation...?

Yes, it is quite evident that Christmas is soon here... Tartu is full of lights & candles on bridges & centers, trees & bushes. So nice when the dark appears and I can just walk around in this wonderful city and enjoy. I am so thankful that God has placed me here! Of course, I`ll spend most of Christmas back home, but I can at least celebrate a bit earlier here.. So yesterday I took out the little decorations I have and made it nice & cozy in my apartment. Not a huge fan of the colour red, but I had to use some ;) And heeeeeps of candles of course!